The Psychology Behind Negotiating
When you negotiate, what’s your mental state of mind? Depending on your mood, biorhythms, the alignment of the stars, etc., your ‘outlook’ on life will be different, every time you negotiate.
If you want to know the mental makeup of your mind, observe what thoughts come to mind first, when you perceive a situation to be positive or negative.
As an example, if you call a friend on the phone and your friend doesn’t answer, depending upon the relationship you have with that person, you may think nothing of it, or you may harbor sinister thoughts, based on why you think your friend didn’t answer.
By observing the thoughts that come to mind first, be they positive (everything is OK in my world – my friend is OK), or negative (something’s not right – I feel something’s going on that I should be aware of), you’ll get an inside look at your own mind.
Once you really come to understand the mental mind that causes you to react in one-way or another, you can use that new knowledge to shape your persona when negotiating.
As an example, if you know you’re entering into a situation (negotiation) and you really don’t expect to walk away with the outcome you seek, don’t walk in with a defeatist attitude. Instead, project a very confident, upbeat, ‘I got this’ attitude. By projecting such an attitude, you can affect the manner by which the other person (negotiator) responds to you.
Case in point: If you’re negotiating with someone that views you as being weak or overly mild mannered, if you project an image that’s stronger than their expectations, they will instantly go into reevaluation mode. While that’s occurring, observe the position you have them in. If it’s appropriate, continue to project the persona you’ve manifested and even consider heightening it.
You’ll be able to maintain the power you’ve gained during that situation (negotiation) until you decide to relinquish it.
If you hear, ‘Have you lost your mind?’, “Man/Woman please (usually comes with hand(s) on hip or hips)’ or any phase such as that, you’ll know you’re nearing the bounds of causing the other negotiator to become apoplectic. You’ll definitely be in control of the negotiation.
Suffice it to say, if you know your mental makeup when negotiation, you’ll know what makes ‘you’ tick. You won’t lose your cool and by doing so, you won’t get hot … and everything will be right with the world.
The Negotiation Tips Are …
- When negotiating, first understand ‘where you are’, then determine how you’re going to get to where you wish to be. If you understand your mental makeup and what ‘makes you tick’, you’ll be more powerful when negotiating.
- During a recession, or any economic downturn, take note of those that take risks, versus those that are more risk averse.. By doing so, you’ll get a good glimpse of the mindset of the individual behind that mind and you’ll be better positioned to deal with that negotiator.
- When you negotiate, never dig in your heels so deeply that you lose your mental perspective. Always keep an open mind and know the paths upon which your mind travels.
by Greg Williams – The Master Negotiator. If you’d like more information on how you can become a savvier negotiator, click here to checkout Greg’s new book, “Negotiate: Afraid, ‘Know’ More.”